I was on my way home from my lecture just now, when I realised I hadn't posted for a while. I started mentally composing my post (as you do) which very quickly deteriorated into a rather wanky moan about how I felt like I was being overwhelmed with work, how I wasn't going to get a decent break at Christmas, how my computer breaking in the middle of term couldn't have happened at a worse time and how I was worried I might not get top marks in my coursework this term.

Then it started raining.
And I thought, great, now I'm wet as well.

Then I realised the rain was cold.
And I thought, brilliant, now I'm cold and wet.

Then it started raining harder.
And I thought, for FUCKSAKE!

And then it started to hail.
By which stage it had become sublime in it's ridiculousness and I had to laugh.

And by the time it had started raining still harder I had realised that I wasn't cut out to be emo, and that I was depressing myself with irrelevant bollcoks.

So I say BEGONE NEGATIVITY!!!! and will instead list the things in my life that make me happy.

I have my health.
I have my friends, who don't just put up with my eccentricities, but positively encourage them.
I have my family whom I love and who are always there for me when I need them.
I am living in a city I love, studying a subject I love (most of the time) that will help me get a job that I will love.
I have a shiny new computer.
I'm going home for Christmas in less than a week, and I can pretend, even if only for a few days, that I'm five again.
Pretending that I'm five again is something I can do quite often.
I have waking up on a Saturday and realising that my hot water bottle is still warm and I don't have to get up.
I have coming in from the cold and snuggling under a blanket.
I have lazy Sundays reading fic.
I have all of my shiny things.
I get to watch my friends and family open Christmas presents that I hope they will love.

And to the emo goblins I say fuck off, you won't be taking up residence in my brain.
And as soon as I thought all this, it stopped raining. Go figure.

So now, I shall put on Christmas music, start writing the report for THE MOST AWESOME COURSEWORK EVAH! and remember how lucky I am.

Just did some serious tidying up of my profile, because Jesus H Christ was it ever teenage in there. (Plus I suspect half the stupid images weren't working anyway when not looking at it on my own laptop, for some reason. Thereby making it look even MORE godawful.)

Tomorrow, I'm actually re-writing the damn profile, what with having had the same one since I was about fifteen. (Seriously, kids. I have been on LJ for about six years wtf.) Also actually updating. I think I've been sleeping far more than is reasonable lately, this being why I wasn't on AIM tonight - five hour naps at 9pm will do that for you. Also also, my dreams have been on CRACK lately. Never bad dreams, just REALLY FRELLING WEIRD.

My flatmate is a shitty manchild and I'm getting bloody annoyed. I was going to rant tonight, but it'll be for tomorrow now because I want to crash again. Ugh.

The sunlight on the eaves of the next street.
Rows of winter spinach.
A homophobic traffic cone.
White ribbons fluttering on the bare vines they spent the summer staving.
A single magpie.
Chimney pots.
A washing-line empty of anything but pegs.
Racing clouds.
The Wendy House.
The vegetable garden spade, left behind when the Landlord harvested the grapes, and now frozen into the earth.
A Virgin Airways flight heading west.
The sky, reflected back and forth from out windows and our neighbours.
The sky.

ArrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!

I am really fed up of being managed by complete Ffffff-wits who do not have any idea of their responsiblities or how you should mange people under you. Like training them properly on processes and keeping them up to date or giving them a refreshers - before giving them work to do that they will mess up cause they are not sure how to do it - oh how I hate working for morons.

Gah, I hate being ill. I've got a throat infection rapidly turning into a chest infection and I've slept ~4 hours since Sunday. So yeah, lectures (one of which I'm supposed to be in right now) aren't really on the cards 'til I've kicked this because this thing is really quite contagious seeing as the rest of the house has it too.

I reiterate - gah.